Monday, August 31, 2009

Reader's Series: FloridaChickie

It is such an honor to be invited to contribute to the Reader's Series of this lovely blog! Thanks for giving me a little space to thank some of the authors who have left a deep impression on me.

I guess I should start with what led me to this fandom. In contrast to many of you, I kind of came late to the world of fan-fic. I had never really heard of its existence until the end of last year. I'm sure I am not alone when I say I discovered the fandom by performing a google search to see if others had thought about filling in the great missing lemon gap left by SM in her Isle Esme chapter. After all that build up to finally get to that honeymoon scene, I should have known it would have resulted in the ultimate cock-block. Damn Young Adult books! Yet, all I can say is TGfFF. Thank.Gawd.for.Fan.Fiction.

So after enjoying some honeymoon stories (I especially loved Vixen1836's amazing "Isle Esme"), I decided to branch out in my google searching. While reading the Twi series, I always got a sense of Edward playing a more dominant role in his romantic relationship with Bella. So this time, I searched for stories that wove bdsm themes into the lives of our beloved Twi characters. I somehow landed upon "The Submissive" by tarasueme. At the point I discovered this story, Tara had posted about 17 chapters so I eagerly devoured it in one very long night. When reading the reviews, I came across a comment from a reader warning Tara to write the story in a way that people would not associate B&E's relationship with domestic violence. I quickly wrote Tara, defending her story, as well as complimenting her for highlighting such a romantic portrayal of a D/s couple. Eager to discuss "The Submissive" with others, I found the story's thread. It was there that I was also introduced to MsKathy. I'll get to her in just a bit.

While trying not to sound too dramatic, I can honestly say that "The Submissive" spoke to me on a very personal level. Without going into too much detail, I used to be active in my then local 'bdsm scene' about a decade ago. I was involved in a D/s relationship that after some time came to a natural end. Shortly later, an incident happened in which a play party became the focus of the local news. Cops busted up a party, trying to cite old puritanical laws that were still on the books. (Charges were later dropped.) Suddenly, I became very aware that my private life could have been subject to media scrutiny as I knew many of the names that were being said in the news. In fact, had my relationship not recently ended, chances are I would have been at that party. Hearing co-workers and friends (not in the know) tease about it after reading the paper or watching the news, scared the living hell out of me. From there on out, I stuffed what was once an important aspect of my sexuality deep inside. As ridiculous as I knew it was, I felt shame and guilt and went back to a vanilla way of life.

When reading Tara's story (and later, "The Dominant"), I suddenly found my old self starting to awaken. Her story reminded me of the true beauty of a D/s relationship and how trust and communication are so vital. I found myself discussing bdsm on the thread, something I had not done for a very long time. It was very healing in terms of coming to grips with my past. MsKathy, author of "Yes, Mistress," also played a huge role in helping me accept my past and welcome back a side of me that I had hidden for too long. I can only hope that the reviews I have left for both Tara and MsKathy have conveyed just how much their stories mean to me. In addition, I think we have something very special on the threads for these stories that go beyond the usual fangirling. I have seen a community reach out to those with questions and concerns, and I have certainly found myself learning a thing or two along the way.

Aside from reading themes of bdsm and lemony honeymoon details, I can assure you that I have branched out by reading a variety of stories that cover different eras, places, characters, and themes. While there are many additional authors I would love to share my accolades, I need to speak briefly about hopeful wager, author of one of my favorite stories, "Twice as Long as Yesterday." Her story was the first one I read which took me out of modern (or non-canon related) times, bringing me to Ireland over a 100 years ago. I instantly fell in love with Lord Cullen, feeling a close kinship to him as I had toured the author's inspiration for his estate, Muckrose in Killarney. I am in constant awe of hopeful wager's poetic words, and how she has me almost forget I am reading fan fiction, save for the reminder when reading the characters' names. If you have not read her amazing o/s for the Age of Edward contest, "Kama Sutra," I highly recommend checking out this extensively researched and believable story.

Thanks again for letting me chat a little about my Twi fan-fic journey. I am in constant awe of the talented pieces of fiction that are all born out of our love of Twilight. As a person who has recently crossed over to writing fiction, I now understand the value and importance of hitting the "review this story" button. I also have a stronger appreciation for all the work it takes to post a chapter. You will never, ever hear me utter the dreaded words, "update soon." Thank you all for taking the time to contribute to this amazing fandom.

Author's Blurb by Hopeful Wager

FloridaChickie is one of those few readers who, when I put out a new chapter or one shot, I wait like a seventh-grader at Science Fair for the judge's decision to get the feedback from. Her reviews are always insightful and point out specific passages or plot points that she found exceptionally engaging. I know she must pay this same homage to the other authors she follows, and called her to the TLYDF stand as an expert witness in quality fanfic.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Guest FicRec: Edward Masen Shares His Lost Youth


Edward Cullen is damn intriguing.  If you peel away Bella’s fluffy, love-colored descriptions, her accounts his mannerisms and actions or conversations what do we know about him besides the obvious?  He’s smart, loyal, observant, over protective, a gentleman almost to a fault, and an object of affection and obsession, not to mention a reluctant and repressed immortal, and quite possibly the most conflicted vampire in literature, YA or otherwise, since Anne Rice’s, Louis de Pointe du Lac.  Outside of the unpublished Midnight Sun, he’s not been given a voice or perspective so his thoughts, emotions and the true nature of his character is stuck in a two dimensional mystery that leaves us to our own imaginations, save for the fanfic authors who dare to crawl into the complicated psyche of our beloved. 

Author Edward A Masen, does in My Lost Youth, what very few fanfic authors have been able to achieve.  She gives our tortured and reluctant hero a believable, honest voice and presents his story with such reverence and simplicity that allows you to imagine that the story she’s telling is his own.  Blondie, author of Dark Side of the Moon, an incredible retooling of the New Moon from Edward’s POV, First Light and a string of other one shots and multi-chapter EPOV works, has been captain of the Mother Ship regarding all things canon and EPOV for as long as I’ve been reading fanfic.  Others have tried and have hit a brick wall, unable to capture the right balance of
self loathing, a spark of his human soul and absolute love for those around him.  In this kind of fic, it’s very common for Edward to come off as whiney or too calculated.  Edward A Masen has struck the right balance and her work in My Lost Youth is an impressive leap into the beautifully tragic and tortured mind of Edward.

The story spans the period of time from 1911 to 1934, and although it doesn’t present in chronological order, it smartly drifts between time periods without hiding behind the use of flashbacks or conversations of remembrance.  It reads more like a series of one shots as opposed to a multi-chapter story, but it remains surprisingly fluid and cohesive.  It’s a format that isn’t common in fanfic and yet in this case, it lends itself to provide a peek into the human life and death of Edward Masen, the dawn of his immortal existence, and the difficult adjustment he suffers as a Cullen.   The unpredictability of the timeline makes for a great surprise in that you never know what slice of his past Edward might be sharing in the next update.

My Lost Youth is a fantastic series of vignettes that about Edward, how he came to be, and the loyalty that was forged when he was Carlisle’s sole companion.  You learn about his time as a newborn, his disturbing discovery of his new abilities and his heartbreaking struggle to remember much less hold on to his humanity.  He fights to maintain his human memories and is especially desperate to hang on to his mother.  His gifts make it possible for him to tell Esme and Carlisle’s story, as he’s seen their shared memories about the first time they met and eventually how she came to be part of the family.

Edward A Masen shows you the initial fear and anger in Edward’s loss, resentment and eventual resignation for what he’s become from the perspective of a confused 17 year old kid who misses his mother rather than the century old character we know so well.  Then the voice of a 20 year old vamp that is so consumed with shame, guilt and regret that he’s very nearly unable to function.  The passage of time and the different voice and tone will be easily recognized as Edward’s but from a time and place has been unavailable to the readers before.  She writes a plausible evolution of Edward, the controlled, self-loathing vampire we all know and love.  She shows you the rise of the teacher, healer and Patriarchal Carlisle, and the unconventional family that is born of his compassion shape Edward in ways that may surprise you.

The purist in me begs that at least the heart of the story, regardless of genre has a nugget of canon – at least one recognizable piece of these characters that we all adore – and My Lost Youth has it in spades.   It’s easy to accept the narration as his absolute truth and history makes it a good read.  The intelligence and care that Edward A Masen takes in her approach makes it beyond good, it makes it great.

Stories that dare to fill in the blanks or flesh out a history that has only been superficially explained, or even fics that tell a back story or provide a new perspective on a favorite scene or chapter are the most difficult to do, much less do well. In My Lost Youth, Edward A Masen provides a perfect little glimpse behind the Twilight curtain and the pre-Bella life, death and rebirth of Edward.  It’s a gem that deserves way more love than its getting.

Earlier this year, the story was chosen as story of the month on Twilighters Anonymous, for the month of May, but despite the honor, and attention it still continues to twist in the wind.  Currently there are only 127 reviews on Twilighted and a paltry 45 on   It’s too good not to be heaped with praise and deserves a much higher review count than is recorded.  Good stories that are rated PG13 are getting lost in the sexual-fanfic-revolution trend that seems to have gripped the fic communities this summer.  PG13 shouldn’t be the death sentence that a lot of great stories are being served, and My Lost Youth is too good to suffer that fate.  Give it a chance, let Edward tell you his story and show this deserving author some love.
Texbelle is the author of the AU-Human, Restoration and Bella’s Hope, winner of the Twilighted – Breaking Dawn Missing Moments, “Hope” category, and is a validation beta on staff at She juggles a full time job as an event planner and consultant, her work on Twilighted, writing her own story and family and friends, and she is also the co-owner of WeBook Apparel.

CharacterExploration: The Psychoanalysis of Bella Swan

The Psychoanalysis of Bella Swan
(Canon Bella)

Pastiche Pen

A lot of us don’t like Bella Swan--which is weird. I don‘t think you‘d find anyone in Harry Potter who truly hates Harry, and yet in our fandom, some seriously slanted faces occur when Bella is mentioned. People will call her a Mary Sue. They will *headdesk* over her early marriage, growl about her Catherine-esque [Wuthering Heights] behavior in the Edward-Jacob love triangle, and snarl at her ovaries for their corruptible production of that oddly named spawn child.

So, yeah, Bella ain’t the shiznit in this fandom but why? My theories:

She’s Not Good Enough for Our Edward

Well, in summary I think its pretty simple. Edward, broody and mysterious, is our modern day Mr. Darcy [Pride and Prejudice]. He is pent-up sex and over protectiveness and happily ever after. So, you’d think he’d go for the Lizzie Bennet sort of character, right?

Unfortunately not. Edward goes for “selfless” Bella Swan, who cleans a lot, makes good grades, and like old books. Part of what makes his choice of Bella odd for me is how broody Edward is. Normally, these saturnine personality types end up with relaxing, funny types that are capable of pulling them out of their mercurial muck holes. We see this from Midnight Sun. Edward is closer to Emmett and Alice than Jasper and Rosalie. This is due to their contrasting demeanor to his own. Now, in Bella’s case her clumsiness and her bouts of temper manage to entertain Edward--but once she’s a wise mommy vampire and her quirks are gone… what is there for Edward to chuckle about?

So, yeah, we want Lizzie Bennett-Bella to be with Edward but instead we get dowdy [Mansfield Park] Fanny Price-Bella.

This leads to our second point.

Bella Is Kinda Boring

She is supposed to be the EveryGirl. Thus, there’s little physical description, and more importantly, there is no history with Bella. She has no past friends. We get subtleties, like her issues with wealth and shopping. She likes music and the Simpsons. We know that she loves doting on people. We know that she is strangely patient. We know that she can’t walk across flat, stable surfaces without tripping. We know that she is kind, but more than kind, she is also aloof. When she turns down Eric, Tyler, and Mike, we don’t see the same guilt and fear of harming them that we might see in a more insecure character--but rather this subtle confidence. There’s a wall between her and the rest of the world until she lets certain people in, e.g. Edward, Alice, and Jacob.

As a side rant, I don’t think she’s actually “selfless” although she does get her energy from helping out other people, which is nice, but I have no idea why Meyer has a hang up on her characters being selfless, self-abnegating, or altruistic.

Bella in Twilight is Not Bella in Eclipse

The Bella to which we’re introduced in the series is not the Bella with which we end. Bella in Twilight acts older than her age. She’s not concerned with teenage shit. She is brave and curious, and once she makes a decision, she stands by it.

Then in New Moon, she starts hearing voices in her head. End of Twilight Bella. And all that crazy shit that she looked down upon that her mom used to do, e.g. jumping out of air planes and taking on dangerous yoga positions, well Bella goes whole hog with the riding motorcycles and jumping off cliffs charade. So, yeah, responsible, mature Bella is bedamned.

And in Eclipse, because Bella hasn’t actually (really, truly) made a decision about Edward and Jacob, she ends up annoying us with her need to please everyone that she cares about.

Then in Breaking Dawn, she cares about Renesmee first and foremost, and once she’s vamped, she’s wise and all-knowing, and loses all of her relatable flaws. Stephenie Meyer called this a happy ending, but happy is not necessarily all that interesting.

How This Has Gone Over in Fan Fic

Not all that well. Basically we dropped canon Bella faster than T Laut could flex his roidy bicep. That’s how fast.

And I thought about trying to list out Bellas in the fandom, but really that’s a pointless exercise given that 90% of writers make Bella themselves. She become the narrator neutral. Anyhoo, let’s talk about canon Bella.

1. Her dialog is understated. She does not have fancy comebacks. She does however…

2. Bella has a temper. One that disappears once Edward dazzles her, but still, she has a temper that makes Edward chuckle.

3. Brown hair and Neutrogena girl skin.

4. Can’t walk in a straight line.

5. As much as she dismisses designer clothes when with Alice, Bella wears a brown sweater, a nice red top, an eyelit shirt, and the occasional skirt. She goes shopping with Angela and Jessica and gives shopping advice. None of which equals her dressing like a bum. Canon Bella does not wear hoodies and converse. Those aren’t adult and mature enough for her. And yet she doesn’t like shopping with Alice, but this is because she sees the expensive clothes as being obsessive, materialistic, and slightly childish--not because she’s a slob.

6. She’s a researcher. She likes to have all the evidence before making decisions.

7. She’s stubborn, and she stands by her decisions.

8. She has no direction in her life, academic-wise, because she’s been so focused on taking care of her mother, and then Charlie, and then Edward. She also takes care of them because she likes doing it, not because she feels obligated. We never get that sense of obligation from Bella.
Pastiche Pen
is a loverly admin of TLYDF, peddler of HP slash, and author of such favorites as The Nymph and the Waterfall, Waxing Crescent, Sin and Incivility, and If Love Could Light a Candle. Send her a nun and a gnome. Or a nun-ish gnome. Or.. a gnome-ish nun? Hmm...
Archived Explorations:

Upcoming Characters:
FanFic Bellas, Esme, Alice, Rosalie, Jacob, Nessie.

Characters still up for grabs: (The groupings are tentative and can be amended for technical purposes.)

If you feel as though you know these characters well, are intrigued by popular characterizations and uses of them, and have the time to offer an exploration installment, please email me at for more information and to snag a character. This is pretty first come, first serve. Writers AND Readers welcome!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Series: Co-Authoring for Lazy and Informative Two-Somes

We’re back….

Yep, time for another dose of co-writing fun with H&T.

So this is #4 in the series, and ironically enough, coincides with week four of our new collaboration,
The Fates
. Yep, we had so much fun the first time that we decided to go back for another puff on the crack pipe.

And given that we are writing together again, we decided to turn this week’s update on its head a bit. We’ve talked to you about the relationship in writing, how to deal with conflict, and ways that successful teams have approached writing their fics. But we’ve not really fielded any questions from you…

So, with that said, we shot some emails out asking for questions on what YOU wanted to know, either about the process in general or specifically how we deal with things during the course of writing.

We received some excellent questions, and answer some that may surprise you, so pull up a chair, prop up your feet, and dig in!


1. How do you go about choosing who writes which character? Have you ever thought of swapping (aside from the crackfic chapter for Breakfast at Tiffany’s)?
  • H: Speaking for myself – no. I’m just more comfortable writing Bella. Don’t know why. When we decided we were going to start The Fates, it was never a question of who would write what (simply because my writing of Edward stinks – hehe!)

  • T: Ha! Well, I think Vladward would disagree with H, but really it was a comfort thing. I recall tossing around the idea, but by this point, we have natural inclinations toward the characters’ voices, and it would have felt uncomfortable to switch it up. We did swap the genders for our goddess of love and god of war though. Ultimately, we spent a lot of time brainstorming how to approach The Fates because our original ideas would have been difficult to write collaboratively. It took us months to flesh out how we could make it work within the realm we were already familiar.

2. How about secondary characters and story lines - do you arm wrestle over who tackles what?
  • H: A lot of it depended on the arc of the story. In Breakfast at Tiffany’s (aka BAT), the secondary characters tied to the story line. In the Fates, the addition of new characters with direct points of view created an opportunity to branch out. I wanted to take one in particular because I thought I could have a lot of fun with him. As for the actual story, it’s not wrestle over who gets them, but who takes them. It’s usually more of an ‘ugh, you deal with that’ as opposed to ‘hey, I want to do that.’ Then again, there was the one time that we did literally flip a coin.

  • T: There have been a couple of times when one of us called dibs on a character we really wanted to write, but by and large, we write by surprise. So, one person might steal a character right out from the other, though typically we’ve discussed general direction of those secondary story lines in advance. I imagine we are exceptionally lucky because I can’t remember a time when we both really wanted to write a character or story line, and it went to the other person. I think the key there is planning. Even if you don’t know exactly what’s coming, knowing strengths and weaknesses will help there.

3. What do you do if your partner is more prolific?
  • H: I am punting to T on this one, so I guess I would be considered the prolific one….

  • T: I think prolific depends on the definition. H is faster than I am usually, but we’re both fairly quick. We go on writing binges where we immerse ourselves in the back and forth, and we can write a lot in a short period of time, but we both need schedules free to do it. It goes back to communication. If I’ve got a lot going on, I’ll let her know, “I can handle one revision and one chapter in the next couple of days.” That way she isn’t waiting for something, and I can assuage my guilt. I know there have been times H has had to wait a couple of days for something, and she’s probably pulling her hair out (by the way, I’m ready for the start of the next chapter ;). If we weren’t both relatively efficient, I think it would be a deal breaker though. I would have a hard time waiting more than a few days for anything I sent out. I’m pretty sure she would too. It really was luck for us that we have similar expectations. I’ve seen partners struggle with this, going in, the speed and quantity of writing expected in a particular time frame really should be discussed.

  • H: I have to come back on this one…a few days??? I remember one time where you were climbing the walls after a few hours woman!

4. Why collab? Easy enough question but really, I just want to know why? It seems that it would add more stress to the process by having to run everything by the other.
  • H: Honestly (no, lie to me!!) I have so much more fun writing with T. It’s an adventure. I tell the story about writing the one shot, and having my blackberry glued to me while at the natural history museum with my son, because I was so curious to see what she came back with. I compare it to passing notes in high school, and in some ways it does feel like that.
    Aside from the ‘fun factor, it’s a great exercise in growth. Writing with someone forces me to deviate from my typical solo writing style – specifically the tone. As for running things by each other, I seriously can’t think of one time where there has been a ‘what the hell are you smoking’ moment. We know the approach we want to take, and have a healthy enough respect for each other to be able to talk about things if there is something that we are unsure of.

  • T: I have pretty much decided I won’t write fanfic solo again. It is a much more painstaking process. In part because I have to write more, but it’s just slower, and my motivation goes down when someone else isn’t relying on me to hurry up and get them something (see above). That said I don’t know that I would even bother trying with anyone but H because we’ve had so little conflict and have a similar approach. I do think for most people, in most situations, it probably is easier to write solo because you can just make on the fly decisions. However, the process is simply more fun with a partner for me.

5. Since you both do different POV's is there a master outline and then individual ones that you each work off of in relation to the character pov you're working on?
  • H: Honestly, we Ramboed it on BAT up until the last 6-7 chapters, and I think it hurt us more than helped us. We’ve taken a bit of a different approach with The Fates (tracking against key plot points that we need to hit and how they all tie together as opposed to a hard chapter by chapter outline) and it has made for a much more fluid writing style, and a much more intricate story. We know what we need to accomplish and how it all interconnects, but it’s not a hard and fast ‘in chapter 17 x happens.’

  • T: Totally depends on the story. With BAT we flew by the seat of our pants. Though as H said, we have more of an outline now, we’ve been careful to leave enough play that we can still set each other up. We start out a chapter by saying, “What’s our goal? What has to happen as a result of this chapter?” From there we can go multiple directions.

6. You've now added the lovely Legna into the mix, so you're giving new meaning to three way (bite me, I'm a perv) how has this addition changed your process, if at all?
  • H: Can you tell that q came from Ninapolitan J I don’t think it has changed things much at all. We write, and when it’s a chapter where Legna’s Fates weigh in, she plugs into the process. I do think we scared the crap out of her at first…we tend to be very prolific, writing chapters in chunks, then going back to weave everything together. When she received 5-6 chapters in the course of a few days, I think we may have taken a few years off her life. But now that we are in full swing, I don’t think it has changed the process at all. If we were writing chapter to chapter, it might make a difference, but given that we operate so far ahead, it’s been pretty seamless.

  • T: Nothing more to say. It’s nice to have another eye and another perspective though. We love what Legna has added in terms of the Fates, but it hasn’t impacted writing process. However, her insight and feedback as a beta has been wonderful, and her writing of the Fates dead on.


7. How do you work thru differences of opinions or vision? I imagine at one point or another there may be instances where you don't always agree. How do you resolve that?
  • H: I think the closest we’ve ever come to disagreement was when we were trying to thresh out the concept for The Fates. T came up with the idea based on a review, and we probably iterated through 2-3 different approaches before we settled on the one we have. It was never a ‘your idea sucks’ type of thing, more of a ‘yeah, I don’t know how well that would work…what if…’ type of conversation.

  • T: Again, we’re either very lucky or particularly good at working together, but we don’t have conflict. We just recently discussed the fact that we’re both very competitive so it’s amazing we work so well together, but maybe that was part of the key. We both want a solid final product so we take the same approach. We can be very direct with each other, and not take it personally. That’s an intangible thing, but so very important. I think you have to trust your gut to an extent. If you’re having trouble talking with a collaboration partner about things, or having a lot of conflict, it may not be the best match. Now that doesn’t mean we don’t discuss and change, but it never feels like disagreement. It feels like collaboration which means building and growth rather than fighting. Your browser may not support display of this image.

8. Have you ever considered posting in a joint account? So the reviews are not split? I know of many collab teams and the review split is always challenging as readers tend to "meet" one of the authors and stay with that one. In some instances they will go with the author that is more active on boards etc. How do you handle that?
  • H: When we started BAT, neither of us were very well known (both still in the middle of completing our first fics), so the thought of posting under a single account never came up. When we started The Fates, I mentioned something about it, and we decided it was a damned if you do, damned if you don’t situation. We’d have the centralized reviews so there is no disparity, but we’d lose the word of mouth or author awareness via alerts and general ‘brand’ (sorry, I’m a marketer, I can’t help but think that way). On the flipside, there is the synchronization of schedules with two accounts (e.g. I am traveling this week and have a 15 hr time difference) that can make posting at the same challenging. There is also the disparity of reviews between our two versions of both stories. It is hard to deal with on both sides, as we both write the story, and therefore share in any accolades or critiques. Ultimately, we are fortunate that we have a handful of reviewers that post feedback to both our profiles.

  • T: I thought this was a good question that a lot of people might not consider. H has always had about triple the reviews I do. And yes, we are a team, but it is hard sometimes to see that big picture and feel like the fic is doing as well as it is. It’s the nature of the beast, of course. You have to be secure enough to know that you both contributed equally regardless of what it looks like on paper. A partner getting higher review counts does need to be sensitive to what that might communicate. I see benefits to a joint account from that perspective, but in the end, there is something about identity that would be hard for me to give up.

9. What do you do if you feel like one person's character is taking over the story or getting too much of the limelight?
  • H: In some ways, BAT was such an Edward centric story, but I never felt like there was a disparity in the characters, if that makes sense. The reality is – doesn’t matter what the fic is – Edward will almost always overshadow all the other characters in the reader’s mind, so I guess that puts who ever isn’t writing Edward in a position of weakness so to speak.

  • T: Interesting, I always thought Bella was the star of BAT. I still rank her among my favorite fic Bella’s because she was so bold. I don’t really think we’ve had a major issue with characters taking over though. There is give and take, ebb and flow. Ultimately, I would argue that because we write back and forth, we know what’s coming. H has written some killer scenes that I sit down and say, “Damn, I can’t live up to that,” but what it does is to force me to rise to the occasion the best I can. That way the story is balanced, and that’s what’s important. All of the characters are part of one arc.

Just Cause they Asked:

10. Would you consider your writing styles similar? Has writing together changed how you write individually?
  • H: I don’t consider our styles similar at all, although we’ve had people comment that the writing flows together so you can’t tell who wrote what. I will say that our styles when we write alone are totally different than when we write together. I don’t know what it is, but we get much darker when writing individually. Our combined work tends to be lighter or have more silly moments. We also tend to work more people in – more of a character piece than focusing solely on two characters.

  • T: That’s a tough one to answer, and I’ll go with yes and no. We have similar approaches to writing, similar values in fanfic, and a strong feeling about our end goals. I think that becomes stylistically similar and is what accounts for that flow between our POV’s. There are brief moments when we haven’t labeled a section where I take a second to figure out whose POV it is, but by and large, I think we have a different “voice” which is complementary more than symmetrical.

11. Can I have in-ur-endoward? Hell, I'll take Garrett off of your hands too.

  • H: You’ll have to talk to T about In-ur-endo. Garrett’s all mine and I’m not giving him up!!
  • T: I think you have to get in line for Garrett. Adorakable thrustward is up for grabs though. He’s a diamond in the rough, ladies. Have at ‘em!

In all seriousness, we are having a lot of fun writing together again, and can’t rave enough about how fulfilling the process and end product are. We know a number of other teams feel the same way, so with that said, here is a list (complied from the Indies and shout outs on Twitter) of some great collaborations – either multi chapter or one shot format. Happy Reading!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

FandomFluff: I Heart Writers

I Heart Writers

Hoosier Mama

I sent my first fan letter to my favorite author in 5th grade.

It’s been 36 years now, and I’ve never gotten a reply.

I may have forgotten about that letter myself, but I keep getting reminded. It was an assignment with many options; I was the only one in the class that chose to “write their favorite author” and the teacher raved about my work to the whole class. Evidently, it made an impression on them. Years later, in high school, or while briefly at home during the college years, I would have former classmates ask me, “Hey, did that author ever write you back?” And I would always respond sadly, “no, she never did.”

The crushing hurt from this oversight has diminished over the years, particularly since I learned the author in question, Carolyn Keene, writer of the Nancy Drew series, doesn’t actually exist. The books were written by many different people over the decades and quite frankly, it’s hard to hold a grudge against a non-existent person.

But this may explain one of my favorite aspects of Twilight fan fiction, namely, the communication between writer and reader. If you send a writer a chapter review or more often a private message (PM), sometimes she will actually write you back! And oh the joy that floods my soul…I love getting responses. Honestly.
I jump up and down in my seat, clapping my hands and squeeing with delight like Alice getting her way. Why? To borrow from Willy Wonka, it’s because the author, the “music maker,” the “dreamer of dreams” herself has noted my existence.

I idolize writers. Well, I idolize really good writers. Always have; probably because their creations take such a strong hold on my brain. I am in awe of any person with an exceptional imagination that allows me to get on board and take flight with them, away from all this hum-drum reality we’re forced to live in.

Can you imagine the joy of interacting with Jane Austen while she posted chapters of her masterpiece on We’d probably send her reviews that read, “That Mr. Collins dude sure is a creeper. I’m glad Lizzy turned him down…but I like Mr. Wickham, and hey, I think Darcy may actually be a pretty decent guy. Could you put more of him in there??” She would no doubt answer with a flowery 200 word treatise on the concept of “patience”, but I would still be enthralled with her reply. Though we readers probably have very little influence on their stories, we do enjoy discussing them…especially with the story’s creator.

Please allow me one word of caution on this subject. I think I’ve made it clear that getting a response from a fanfic writer puts a huge smile on my face and makes my insides all tingly. The problem is…sometimes I feel twinges of guilt. My conscience says, Hey you! Don’t you realize how many people, including you, are waiting for a chapter update? And you’re wasting her time sending her PM’s that she feels obligated to answer? Selfish much??

For that reason, I’m careful about who and why I message. I would never send questions requiring a reply to tby789 or DeviKalika for example, because I don’t want to waste their time answering my silliness when the whole fandom is desperately craving chapter updates to “
The Office
” and “
Oh, Inverted World
.” Have patience, young grasshopper (That’s what I call myself…young grasshopper.); everything will be written in due time. I only send PM’s when I’ve found a typo or two, (When it’s chock full of typos, I generally don’t waste my time.) or when I have something to tell the author that the whole world doesn’t need to know about.

I have enjoyed a brief, dignified correspondence with a few fanfic writers about their creations. (One such is
. You’re all reading “
Mind’s Eye
” right? It’s deliciously creepy.) I love the interaction with the author and my conscience stays completely guilt-free.

And I still squee and do a little happy dance whenever I get a reply.

You can blame my reaction on that god damn Carolyn Keene.

This has been a Fandom Fluffy Moment brought to you by
Hoosier Mama

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

FandomFluff: Laundry Day or Oblivious Fan?

Laundry Day or Oblivious Fan?

Hoosier Mama

Driving to Chicago from small-town-Indiana where we live, my husband and I decided we were close enough to the city to be among people who knew what an Italian beef sandwich is supposed to look and taste like. So we stopped to eat at a busy place near the interstate.

As I sat there, enjoying every bite of hard roll heaven, garlicky juices and hot peppers dribbling down my chin, I took note of a small family sitting across the large, crowded room from us. The mom looked to be in her 30’s and her shirt immediately had my attention: she was wearing a black Team Edward shirt.

I immediately felt a kinship with the woman. We shared a love of Edward, except she was courageous where I was not. I don’t own any Twilight shirts; I like to keep my fanaticism on the down-low. The last fanatical shirt I owned had, “May the Force be with you” written on it with the original Star Wars logo. I wore that shirt in high school during the late 70’s until it slowly faded to death and, trust me, it was cool with a capital C. But wearing a Twilight shirt? Not even at a Twilight convention but in broad daylight at a restaurant in Merrillville?
I’m way too sensitive to handle the snickers, the eye rolling, and the outright hostility I’m afraid the shirt would generate these days. Sometimes being a Twilight fan makes you wonder if this is what it felt like to be thrown to the lions.

Was she displaying bravery? Perhaps her character was strong enough that she wasn’t bothered by anyone else’s opinions. Maybe she was simply unaware of the building backlash against all things Twilight. Ignorance is bliss after all. Either way, I felt compelled to let her know she wasn’t alone. As grateful as I am for friendships made in the fanfic community online, life can be a bit lonely out in the real world.

We would be passing her table to leave the place, and I felt I had to recognize her in some way as a fellow fan. A nod of the head would be nice, but she wouldn’t get the Twilight connection. I could gesture to the front of my shirt, looking at her shirt and saying “nice” with a thumbs up like Kristen Stewart in the prom scene, but she would definitely think I was referring to her boobages. While I have read
’s “
Yes, Mistress
,” I’m definitely not of that persuasion.

As we got up to leave, I still didn’t know what to say or do. A plethora of thoughts quickly swam through my head. She could be one of my favorite fan fiction writers! I could be missing an opportunity to talk to Tara Sue Me, or AngstGoddess003, or (sigh!) Gondolier! (I could use Hydraulic Level Five code words, “Are you a sucky vampire?”) Then again, maybe the shirt has no meaning for her at all. Maybe it was clean and its laundry day at her house. I’ll just be embarrassing myself. I should just leave and not say anything.

But I couldn’t…I stopped at her table, looked her in the eye and with a friendly grin spoke two words, direct and to the point:

“Nice shirt.”

She looked down, puzzled, then looked back at me smiling and said, “Thanks.”

She understood. We connected. Our conversation was perfect. My husband rolled his eyes at me while I got in the car, gleefully content.

This has been a Fandom Fluffy Moment brought to you by
Hoosier Mama

Monday, August 24, 2009

Author Interview: birdee18

1. What inspired you to write this particular story?

I honestly think it was divine inspiration that led me to write What Happens Tomorrow. I just got the idea one day and started writing. I couldn't even tell you how I came up with it. Then I started receiving reviews and PMs from people who have experienced the same things Edward is going through. They told me how realistic my story was and how they could relate because of their own experiences. I've even been told that the story is therapeutic. I can't believe my little story has touched people so much. That's why I truly believe that someone bigger than me is the driving force behind this whole thing.

2. In general Edward is a character that is generally always in control and strong, has it been difficult for you to write this particular version of him, or do you find it easier?

It's actually been quite easy for me to write Edward in this story. In the books he's always been a bit self-loathing and has felt like he wasn't good enough for Bella. I'm trying to convey the same thing in WHT. His disabilities make him feel like he isn't worthy of Bella's love. Bella, of course, loves him no matter what. I think it's the same feelings that SM writes, but they're just in a different context.

3. What scenes if any have been the most difficult for you to work through?

This is going to sound crazy, but I have a hard time writing the happy scenes in this story! The angsty parts come very easily. I'm not sure why because I'm generally a very happy person.

I did have a rough time, though, with the breakdown scene in Chapter 8. It was difficult for me to put Edward in such a vulnerable position, but it was something that needed to be done. In the end, I was pleased with the way it came out.

4. Do you have plans for other stories after this one?

I do have two other stories in the planning stages. One is going to be another angst-filled ride. The other is my version of Renesmee's birth in Breaking Dawn which I think you'll find quite entertaining. Seriously.

I've recently posted a one shot that's a parody of the song "Play That Funky Music." I rewrote it as an ode to Edward!

5. Would you ever consider writing an AU vampire story? If so would you follow SM’s version or would you come up with your own twist on it as well?

I'd love to eventually write an AU vampire story. I'd combine SM's canon and character traits with my own twists and turns. It would have to be a comedy, though, because I don't know if I could write a serious vampire story. As I said earlier, I'm a pretty happy person, and I love to laugh. Somewhere deep inside of me I feel that Twilight: The Comedy is itching to get out!

Sunday, August 23, 2009

GuestFicRec: An Original Enigma


This beautiful story, written by Dryler, begins with our lead character Bella Swan re-reading a letter she has received from reclusive author, Ethan Church.

In Bella’s words, Church’s books are about people dying; not necessarily physical dying, but their minds and emotions slowly fading until nothing but empty shells remain. She is shocked and assumes that a mistake has occurred when she receives an offer to pen his autobiography. A translator by profession, she is lost as to the reasoning behind this request and replies back explaining the misunderstanding, seemingly putting the event behind her.

On a routine trip to a bookstore, curiosity gets the better of Bella and she finds herself drawn to a copy of one of Ethan’s novels and subsequently unable to put it down. Here is where Dryler so masterfully begins weaving the mystery into her story. Bella finds herself pulled into Church’s writing, physically feeling the words and emotion of his prose vibrating within her body, a deep and pulsing feeling that settles in her chest and refuses to leave. She purchases all his published works and takes them home, withdrawing from life, unable to pull away until she’s finished them all. Throughout this time, she experiences a feeling as if she’s being watched. Is this reality or something brought on by her over stimulated senses? At this point, we as the readers are in the dark.

We learn more about Church. He’s an enigma, having written 48 novels without ever being interviewed. No one knows what he looks like, how old he is or even where he’s from. The end of the first chapter finds Bella with yet another letter from him, this time containing a stack of legal documents, a check, and a simple note:

I assure you there has been no misunderstanding. EC

To say that this gave me goose bumps would be an understatement.

Our adventure begins. We follow Bella as she travels to Washington to meet Church. We find him to be an enigmatic, frail, elderly man and watch as she explores the beautiful yet supposedly haunted grand house and grounds known as Ferndale.

There is a constant undertone of mystery as we read of thunderstorms, darkened hallways, and flashes of a beautiful figure which appear and disappear in the blink of an eye. Bella sees him yet again as she slips out of bed on a moonlit night and follows a path into a winding hedge maze. Who is this man? Is he a ghost, a figment of her imagination? And why does he always accompany the same familiar pull and physical humming in her chest?

The author has managed to beautifully weave a tale of suspense around characters we care about and want to hear more from. The ideas are clear, each word painting the scene without unnecessary or overly elaborate wording jumbling up the image. I find myself constantly forming opinions about where this story will lead, knowing only that Dryler certainly has something far greater in mind.

Ethan Church” was nominated for “Best Original Character WIP” and “Most Original Story Line WIP” at the Indie Twific Awards and is spellbinding from the first word until the most recent chapter, where we finally hear the mysterious figure speak. I haven't been this excited about a new story in a long time and can't wait to see where she takes this.
When not delighting fandom with her Beautiful Bastard in The Office, tby789 is bringing the guiltiest pleasures to the fandom via the Twigasm Podcast.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

CharacterExploration: Dr. Hot Bitch and the Daddygate Debate

Carlisle Cullen

So, you’re probably scratching your collective heads and asses wondering why Ninapolitan, is writing an essay on Carlisle.

Well I say why not? Sure, you can say a canon writer should have tackled (yum) the Cullen family patriarch but you’re stuck with me. I promise to be fair and only drool minimally.

Most would venture to say that I have a disturbing, in a non-psychotic way of course, love for Carlisle Cullen. I’ve also got the biggest collection of hideously inappropriate avatars that all include the delish Dr. Cullen.

This pic doesn’t qualify me for shit, just a lady that’s been a fan of Peter for years

One could argue that I have dubbed him one of the most recognizable, albeit unfortunate nicknames within the fandom. Let the record show, ‘Hot Bitch Carlisle’ wasn’t something that I thought would stick, especially after making him such a ridiculous representation of such a well loved character, but I digress. I blame Peter. * sigh *

Peter Facinelli, the almighty hotness with those scrumptious chipmunk cheeks is at fault for the much ridiculed (algonquinrt hates it) nickname did lend to the love (obsession) I have for Dr. Hot Bitch. Regardless of that fact,
even before the casting (no, I’m not lying) I did always find the character of Dr. Cullen to be my favorite.

The Twiverse is loaded with everything from the truly OOC manifestations, where the only thing that remains true are his damn name and maybe some of his physical attributes (mine from BSD is obviously in this category). But I wasn’t in the dirty trenches of the ficroll looking for those,hell no. I’d write my own ridiculous incarnation about Carlisle being a streaker in a mall parking lot wearing only a bow tie and a Burberry trench coat. (Don’t steal that it’s in the works and yes, I am that insane.)

So if it was totally OOC that I was looking for what was the search about? My quest was for the memorable portrayals of our dear beloved, hot and dirty, damn tangent again sorry. Let me start again, I wanted the versions

My Hot Bitch
of Carlisle that are so in-depth, that are such well thought out and descriptive adaptations of him that they have you questioning what is and isn’t from Meyer canon. To steal from the Bellies, the canon fic that is better than canon.

That point leads me to…canon Carlisle. Now, because I’m a perv, I immediately want to make a joke about Carlisle and his canon but again, I digress.

Canon Carlisle

When I began polling authors and readers for their thoughts on the different portrayals of Carlisle in the fandom, one of the most consistent comments was “It depends on how canon Carlisle is written as a father.”

What do I mean? There were essentially two major themes among the parties that I questioned. On one hand some people felt that some writers present Carlisle as too much of a Ward Cleaver or Mr. Cunningham. Some felt that he is written as an inappropriate replacement as their human fathers when in reality he’s only their ‘father figure’ (cue George Michael music) but they’re all technically adults free to make their own decisions. He should be portrayed as a role model, someone to guide not punish. The following is a comment that was a great representation of the middle of the road when it came to Daddygate.

As for what I loathe in Carlisle characterizations, it is when people make him too old or too paternal. He is supposed to be a 23-year-old vampire. Yes, for his time period that would make him rather mature, and he of course had centuries of experience, but there needs to be some hint of youthful vigor. Whether it is a bit of innuendo or hanging out with the younger Cullens, that is important to me.

The baseball scene is a perfect example of both sides to the debate (and one that is on constant loop at my house). Carlisle IS a twenty-three year old vampire who happens to have been born in the 1640’s.

So many crass jokes about hitting a homerun come to mind...
He’s a spring chicken compared to Aro’s whispy, geriatric ass. So why shouldn’t he be rounding the bases with me, er, I mean his family? But, in a matter of a few minutes, Carlisle’s demeanor switches from lighthearted and jovial to fiercely protective when the crazy nomads show up to threaten his family. * sigh * It’s reasons like that, why Carlisle is my favorite character.

The other side to the great debate over Daddygate is that he should be viewed as a more fatherly figure instead of just the proverbial head of the family.

I tend to view him as being more parental than not, because I think it was his relationship with Edward, and the direction it took, that lead him to becoming the steadfast leader we see in the books.

It’s true that all of his experiences have helped him grow into the truly complex character that he is. His past is what helps him educate and nurture his family. I don’t think that anyone can doubt that Carlisle sees the Cullens as a true representation of a family unit. I don’t particularly care for the word coven, especially not in regard to the Cullens.

One reason to love canon Carlisle is that he is really our beloved Edward-just a little older and a little wiser. In Carlisle, you can see the finished version of the man that Edward is becoming.

If that isn’t the best sales pitch for an eternal fount of Carlisle love, I don’t know what is.

The Not-So Canon Carlisle

Past & Present
: When I sent out the “Gimme your fave Carlisle stories”, thirty two people gave me their opinions, from AU/AH/Slash, all of it. Two of the stories

I may not be canon but I’m still magnificent.
that consistently were the mentioned from nearly every person polled (via twitter), were “Ithaca is Gorges” for Canonlisle and ‘Past & Present’ by Giveusakiss413 for the Not-so-canon (but still wicked hot) Carlisle.

I’m not going to lie. I love this Carlisle almost more than my own Hot Bitch. He’s the Vamp Hot Bitch of the Vamp world in my opinion. He’s tragically flawed, in love with Bella and God, for as tragically canon with pairings as I am, I almost wish he ended up with the Bella of this story. I can’t say that about any other story.

My point is (besides my undying love of this version of HotBitchBiteMeCarlisle, is that even in this story, where Meyer canon is thrown so off course because of who did Edward’s change and other pertinent events, the underlying sense of utter devotion to those that he loves is there and strong and beautifully written.

All My Human Carlisle

I doubt many people can/would argue that All-Human stories have an enormous place in the fandom. Obviously, you’ve got a lot of freedom when writing in that genre. I know that I could never write in canon, and I commend anyone that does.

That being said, have you ever noticed how many stories there are in the all-human genre that even though you’ve got the creative freedom, many still portray Carlisle as the patriarch? Sure, there are some where he and the other men are cousins or friends, ‘
Deconstructing Dracula
’ by
, and “
The Fan
” by
are two that have Carlisle closer in age (though unfortunately both still have him married to ‘you know who’).

My point is, that 7/10 stories have Carlisle and ‘that woman that shall not be named married’ with at least one

This has nothing to do with anything, I just think it’s hilarious.
natural Cullen child or an adopted one (or many). What I find interesting though, is how he is portrayed as a father in the all-human stories. Case in point:

In Art after 5, Carlisle is a friend first and a parent second to Edward, a prodigy who never felt comfortable around his peers.

In my opinion, I could read that statement and not have any clue if she were referring to a canon or OOC story. That is how I see their relationship. I think there is a happy medium with them, a mutual regard for each other that to me isn’t necessarily one-side by being paternal but much more of a brotherly level of respect.

There is a very telling conversation between Carlisle and Bella and his relationship with his son in Colleen’s story.

“Surely he's told you how close we are.”

“Yes. He claims you're his best friend and that he tells you everything. I just have a hard time believing him.”

Carlisle laughed. “Well, you should believe him. He's telling the truth.”

“He actually does tell you everything?” I asked. “As in everything everything?”

“Yes, Bella.”

“Fuck,” I muttered.

Carlisle laughed.

Carlisle, whether in canon or not, is an extremely complex character. He’s a strong willed and compassionate man, his love for his family is almost always an integral part of the story in some form or fashion.

So in closing, I’d just like to pass along some of my favorite Carlisle portrayals.

Honestly, when it comes to Big Daddy Carlisle and (his) canon you really shouldn’t look any further than, Giselle’s ‘
Ithaca is Gorges
’. If I didn’t mention this story, I’d be doing Carlisle, er, I mean I’d be doing the essay on Carlisle a huge disservice.

Essentially, Ithaca is the Cullen’s New Moon, and is truly a remarkable piece of writing. Giselle’s done a outstanding job of taking that dark, painful and tortured and virtually unknown timeframe that the

Hellooooo, Doctor.
Cullen’s lived through and expressed it solely through Carlisle and Edward’s perspectives. That alone, is only a shred of what makes this story so profound and intriguing.

The Tutor
” by ItzMegan73. Not only does Megan write one of the only teenage stories that I read and love, she embraces the teenage mentality wonderfully. She also manages to write a Carlisle and wife that act like parents to teenagers. They’re not conveniently absent nor do they turn a blind eye as in some stories. They’re also not obscenely overprotective and OOC. They’re parents and I love the story.

The Vampire in the Basement
” by Michellephants. I rec’d this way back when and I believe that 98% of the fandom has read it but it needs repeating. I love the way Michelle has written Carlisle, aside from this truly beautifully written Edward, Carlisle is my next favorite character in this story. Another example of how even though they’re not ‘his’ children, he does everything in his power to protect them and keep his family safe.

I’ve got a list a mile long of OOC, asshole Carlisle, smutty Carlisle (not in a gross way, just in an ‘I like sex’ kind of way. I know I bust balls, and make fun of his wife but in all sincerity it take a lot of work to write truly canon stories.

Eve, the Apple of my Eye
” from Bethaboo is a phenomenal example of a great in character story that follows the couple.

No Longer Alone
” and “
A Coming of Age
” by Elise Shaw were rec’d to me by MsKathy and Algonquinrt and I devoured them. They’re just two more examples of unbelievably well written and detailed stories.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this little ride on the Carlisle train. I tried to be good. I hardly cursed at all and I was respectful (mostly) to my favorite character. Honestly, if you guys want some good and dirty ones, let me know I’d be more than happy to pass those beauties along, Lord knows I read enough of them.

Oh, and Peter smells like fresh laundry and mint. He chews a ridiculous amount of gum and is honestly THE NICEST celebrity that I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. Yes, I’ve met a bunch after living in NYC for a while but he takes the cake. He was genuine and humble and receptive to every fan that was there, even after six hours of non-stop crazy.

I want to thank the wonderful Sam for allowing me to do this, I owe her peanut butter and chocolate chip cookies and I will send them.

I leave you with the good Dr. Cullen.

And my favorite Peter videos…good Lord.

, HBIC of the
pervily perfect PPSS
, also authors such classics as
The Bella Swan Diaries
The Wingman
. She's known for smut and fluff and has the cutest little accent.
Archived Explorations:

Upcoming Characters:
Esme, Alice, Rosalie, Jacob, Nessie.

Characters still up for grabs: (The groupings are tentative and can be amended for technical purposes.)
The Denali Sisters

If you feel as though you know these characters well, are intrigued by popular characterizations and uses of them, and have the time to offer an exploration installment, please email me at for more information and to snag a character. This is pretty first come, first serve. Writers AND Readers welcome!

Friday, August 21, 2009

Ask Dirty Uncle WTVOC (Or Jandco...)

Our favoritest of dirty uncles is chillin' like a villain on vacay this week, so we have the extreme pleasure of once again hearing from the ever-loverly Jandco.

Dear Dirtiest Oncle of Them All,

Okay, I'll admit it. I'm pretty new to the fandom (read as: started posting my story in february, started reading a few weeks later) and while I do my best to look around and find things on my own, I have my flaws. I've searched and searched, but there is something that I have been looking for and just can't find.

No, I'm not talking about the meaning of life, my fandom life partner, or the perfect shade of red lipstick.

I'm talking about high-quality non-canon pairing stories.

I feel guilty admitting it, but I feel like a bit of a hypocrite. You see, while the only stories I've *written* have had non-canon pairings, I have only *read* maybe three stories that didn't have canon couples.

Now, my pairing of choice is E/B, with some J/A (and even a little J/E and J/B) action going on. I don't have too many problems finding those stories. After all, we all know that finding a good E/B story is about as easy as finding the nose on the front of your face, especially with the help of the blogs and podcasts. But where do I go to find a good story with non-canon pairings?

Cluelessly Awaiting Your Answer,

Dear Soon To Be Not Clueless,

I sincerely hope you meant all human as well as that is what I read and am prepared to offer.

Run like hell to read The Elite by Fate of Gabriel. It’s non-canon pairing glorious. I’ve waxed about the genius of this story before on here, so I won’t again—but read it. Read it now.

My other favorite non-canon pairing is Son Of a Preacher Man by LaViePastiche. This lady made a Jasper that made me ask, “Uh, Edward who?” (Which should be impossible)

As of now, this story is Bella/Jasper, Rosalie/Edward—and random others and it’s just…such angsty, hilarious, well written fun.

That’s all I got right now, I hope you enjoy—
Dear wtvoc,

How do you differentiate angst from drama when categorizing a story? What if your drama's angsty or your angsty's drama? What is the mathematical formula one uses to decide? I'm honestly not sure. Truth be told, I even didn't consider angst a genre until I read fanfic, but since I've seen the light, I've wondered this often about some stories.


Dearest Hay-Zeus (I assume this is the proper pronunciation of your moniker as Jesus is all knowing)

Um. Unfortunately, you get Jandco, not the dirty uncle this week, and that is sad, because that means you are asking the way wrong lady.


I can offer this: I once labeled a story angstfluff. That’s right. I did. Because, dammit, it was both! The point is, I can relate to your dilemma and let you know it’s okay to categorize it however the heck you want. If the story is quality, the genre you label it as doesn’t matter much. Obviously, don’t be killing off Edward and give Bella cancer then label it humor. Use your common sense, because really, don’t all good stories have a bit of all the elements?


I believe on you can click-a-roo more than one genre.

I hope, but don’t think, that helped.

Official Time Waster,
Dear All-Knowing Pervy Uncle,

First, I'd like you and the ladies at Twigasm for helping me embrace my inner perv! I am thoroughly enjoying it and living it up, as my friend Kim saw this past weekend!

Second, my question. I am here to inqury about reviews from a author. I must admit when I first came to the world of FanFiction (thanks to Wide Awake) I had no idea what I was getting into as I did not know what FanFiction was before Twilight and WA. So I read and never reviewed. I know, I know. I can make excuses but it doesn't matter, I now review everything I read. I do my very best to review every single chapter of every story I read. Sometimes I wonder though, I read your blog every week and you have said "review, review, review". For the most part you said as long as your not an asshole and your constructive and don't just say update it's all good. But I have been soo curious. I tend to leave long reviews - I quote chapters - sometimes when I am inspired by a chapter, I leave silly notes for the authors, and sometimes ramble about the chapter.

A few of the authors I review regulary I have gotten to know and chat with (which I absolutely love) and they tell me how much they like my reviews. But sometimes I feel as though my reviews might come across as annoying and too time consuming. That maybe it would be better to not leave my regular review - just shorten it and be "quick", kind of summarize. Do you have any advice on this??

P.S. Thank you, and please thank Jasper and Carlisle for answering my ticklish question quite thoroughly. I enjoyed the response! :)

dedicated fangirl,
Jess (aka BBSapphire24)

Dear Jess-we-have-the-same-name!

I love me some long reviews! I know, I know, it’s a disgusting ego stroke and getting validation from perfect strangers is pathetic—but still. I love them.

And the ego stroking aside—here’s why:

When a reviewer takes the time to quote chapters and offers lengthy opinions it often offers a whole new perspective to the author.

Many times I’ve read a review and thought: Wow. I didn’t even see that. And that is what is wonderful about reading—it’s open to interpretation. A reader reads it and takes things from it—and then someone else can read it and find something completely different to relate to or ponder over.

Then again, sometimes I get a long review that quotes or goes on to dissect the chapter and the reviewer has pointed out everything I meant to get across—I SCREAM IN DELIGHT as though Johnny Depp, Robert Pattinson and Adam Lazarra all just crawled into my bed.

What I’m saying is there is nothing like the feeling of knowing that someone out there ‘got it’ and was affected enough to share.


I never sigh or wince when I see a long review.

I print them out and affix them to the fridge with Chinese take-out magnets.

Keep writing up the long reviews, I assure you they are appreciated—
Dear Many Names,

I have to say I love this fandom to death. I do, honestly. But sometimes it drives me crazy. It seems like every time I get online people are complaining about something else. And half the time what they are complaining about has nothing to do with them. Do we all not have enough drama in our lives already?

Okay, sorry about my rant. Onto the real question.

Why do so many people put car crashes in their fics? It seems every fic I open has a car crash in it. I swear I just got two new chapter updates and both of them had car crashes in them. I have become so annoyed with this. Then we have to go through the whole hospital/recovery thing. It's become so over done. Why do you think this is so popular?

Peace & Cookies (I have offered you these things once before)
Confused Reader

Dear Probably Will Remain Confused Reader,

Oh, the drama.

I will tell you a story.

Last year, I wrote my first fanfiction and it was fun and productive and I became addicted. And I had NO IDEA there were sites and forums and actual human to human contact goings on all based on fanfiction and Twilight.

And I was ignorantly blissed.

Then, because I was an addict, I needed more, I ventured out and found A WHOLE GROUP OF PEOPLE JUST LIKE ME.

Close friendships via the interwebs were quickly forged and I loved it even more—and we didn’t just discuss fic or the fandom. We talked personally about our real lives and our real feelings.

Then, random little spats about who-said-what and she-posted-this- and that-was-my-fic-quote and you know…all of it…started happening.

And people turned mean.

They said mean spirited things out of anger and for fun and out of boredom. They said awful things about people they don’t even personally know.

And I’m guilty of this as well—and that shit is downright shameful.

Now, the question is why. Probably because it’s human nature to pick sides and gang up and to not want to be on the outside of things (most of us have been to middle school, right?) Maybe because it’s a group chock full of women and admit it or not, fic writing is a competitive little game. Some people out there just find it impossible to support others ventures and cannot stick to the ‘don’t like it, don’t read it’ rule. Instead they must make their feelings known—and as long as they rant about a publicly posted story, that’s fine. But. Too often it’s a personal attack on the author—someone they don’t even know. Maybe because people bond over a mutual dislike for another.

And then opposing cliques stick up and defend one of their own…and it’s a posting war.

And at the end of the day, when you close or log off your computer, all of it meant nothing. People are hurt and offended and angry…and for what?

Ain’t no one getting paid or laid, ladies.

Keep in mind we’re all doing the same thing here—reading, writing and loving or making fun of Twilight. How hard can it be to support each other?

It’s too easy to act like a big shot behind the computer screen and it’s too easy to say awful things to and about someone’s mother, daughter, sister, friend…when you don’t have to look them in the eye. Still. It hurts as though it was said to your face.

Believe me.

I know.

At any rate, I rarely post on the forums anymore and because of that, the Twilight Fandom is a very nice place to be. I don’t want to be mean spirited toward others and I don’t want the same reflected back on me. I’m sure the day to day drama is still there—but I’m unaware of it and the world keeps turning even though I don’t know who said what about who-- and I’m happy.

Here’s my advice:

Be nice, always. Those people have feelings. If you wouldn’t want someone to know what you’re saying about them, don’t type it.

Don’t post when you’re feeling too strongly about a situation. Close your computer, do something in real life and come back to it and see if it still matters to you that much. Chances are the drama of the hour will be over by the time you come back.

If you’re sick of the drama, weed out the good friends that you’ve made and hit them up in gchat or on the good old fashion phone.

Ask yourself if you would want your child behaving like that or if you’d want your mother to know what you’ve been saying on the internet. Give yourself a respectful reputation for crying out loud. There is much to be said for a class act.

And lastly, ask yourself two questions:

Am I part of the problem?

Am I part of the solution?

If you answered no, it isn’t your business. Carry on with your day. If it’s yes…do what you gotta do—but ask yourself how you got into that business in the first place so you can avoid it in the future.

End of rant.


Car crashes.

Because it’s angsty and can lead to comas, disabilities, amnesia, love triangles, cliffhangers—all excellent fanfic plottage. And Edward Cullen with stitches and bruises is hot.

But you’re right.

What ever happened to good old electrocution or a heart attack? Surely we can come up with something more creative to injure our little Twilight pets.

(From your dirty uncle) So, how'd my lady do? Wish us luck for this weekend, and send your questions to!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Admin Essay: The End of Fail

Hey-a fan fic boys and girls, (yes, we know those boys are out there). I’m just gonna lay this out there.

I’m cranky.

(AG: No, really. She seriously is and I'm sorry in advance...)

Yep. Totally. Do you care? Probably not. But it’s relevant I think to the fandom and everything going on out there in Twiverse. If you don’t want to hear me whine about it turn back now.

AngstGoddess has been avoiding my gchat pings for days now. I tried to blame it on PMS but that’s a lie. I’m just in fail.

(AG: When I get tired of angst, there's a serious issue.)

I think my crankfail began after ComicCon. Boy, did I love CC. It was my idea of heaven. Dorky boys and girls dressed like super heroes and weird anime characters that I didn’t understand. I had a suitcase full of my own nerdy shirts to wear and happily sat in a panel about an old lady who was the voice of Rocky (Bullwinkle’s friend) and forgot to sleep or eat for three days.

(AG: It was actually four days...)

I breathed the same air as Rob and Johnny Depp. I zoomed my camera on RP’s golden locks and super sharp jaw, pretending that when Kstew spoke it was really that “wah wah wah wah wah” sound you hear on Charlie Brown cause I just can’t go there .

(AG: Stop making me shudder. I blocked that shit out like BD, you know?)

But since I left, I have been in the doldrums. So sad and irritable. Plus, it’s the end of the summer and I can no longer ogle underage boys at the pool, or make snarky faces at the other moms from my "holier than thou" position in my white lounge chair.


AG told me it was my turn to write an article and I mulled it and came up with some ideas but everything seemed all “meh” and lame and finally I said, fuck this, I’m gonna rant.

(AG: Thanks a lot for the encouragement, Pastiche. THANKS.)

So here we go.


First, I haven’t been able to get a photo or Robward in WEEKS that doesn’t have a blurry, butchy, Joan-Jetted haired, Kstew next to him. It’s bumming me out. I just need one shot of his jaw or his glorious hands playing air guitar or his pasty white feet or wonky button-fly jeans and I will be better.

I promise.

(AG: Trufax, but I got some Jackson today, so you know, I'm all set.)

Then, I think I’m a little emo because my fic is coming to an end. It’s always depressing saying goodbye. I love COHward and want to keep him in my pocket and rub his little obsessive compulsive head, and make him do polite but dirty things to Bella, but I can’t cause it’s time to let him go.


(AG: There's always pizza cutter gayward outtakes, js js.)

Which you know, other stories are ending….Wide Awake (cough*ifAGeverfinishes*cough) (cough*Dear Angel, STFU <3, AG*cough),
Deconstructing Dracula
In The Blink of An Eye
Trust in Advertising
Port Angeles Players
and sigh, I feel like my obsession,
Tropic of Virgo
must becoming to a close but I haven’t looked on her thread cause I can’t take the news.

(AG: It's better to have read and lost than to have never read at all...)

Also, I feel like every story I read lately is making me depressed. Like “please give me a gallon of ice cream and the episode of BTVS where she kills Angel but he goes non-evil just before she pushes him in to whatever dimension of hell he has to go to” depressed. Bella leaves Edward. Edward leaves Bella. I KNOW. I KNOW. This is nothing new but good grief, for example, if something good doesn’t happen soon in
Hydraulic Level 5
, I’m totally quitting that fic.

(AG: OMG, that Buffy episode. Hold on. I'm all verklempt. DON'T STAB HIM, HOOR!)

I am such a liar.

Once an addict-always an addict.

(AG: M-A-S-O-C-H-I-S-M: My anti-drug.)

Then I keep getting these recs. And guh they are so good. But they are only 12 chapters long and I just can’t read them because I’ve been around this block and I have moved my 12 chapter minimum to about 20 chapters unless it is an author that has a history of updating frequently and completing because well, that is just my rule. No offense.

(AG: Wait, wait. First you bitch about fics ending, and then you bitch about fics that don't end. Christ, woman. Midol FTW, kwim?)

This of course is also kind of a lie because I cave in under the pressure of my peers and read the links they send me.

(AG: Yeah. Don't lie.
The Neighbor Boy
Vanilla and Chrome
totally de-failed you.)

But then, there is good stuff too right? Minisinoo has been
updating her HP fic again
. (I KNOW it’s not Twilight but it has Cedward in it so it feels like it), and there are new websites in the works and its fall, so Bones should be coming back on the air soon and I can get some of my delightful David Boreanaz back (again, vampire related I promise).

Halo has a new fic,
Last Rites
, and Tropic of Virgo isn’t over, not yet, and people keep writing about Edward having tattoos and that just makes me happier than you would believe.

(AG: God fucking bless the genius who came up with the
Tattward and Inkella

And, we keep getting these New Moon trailers that have way too much Jacob and not enough Edward but the little bits of Edward make my ovaries burst into flame because he is moving his lips and the shot is on his glorious jaw side and HE ISN’T WEARING A SHIRT, and well, that’s enough for me.

(AG: Angsty Strip Tease! BRB, finding illegal video and remembering americnxidiot's faux re-enactment at ComicCon...)

And, I am in the works for two new fics. I am. But that isn’t here or there except its fall right? I can go to Target and get a new glitterific pink Hello Kitty notebook and scribble fresh ideas into for all these insane ideas that scurry around my brain. Hmmmm…what to make Edward do now…

(AG: Jasper?)

Finally, just to prove to you that the fail has to becoming to an end this was posted tonight and everything is better…

Angel/edwardzukorocks writes for the Twilight fandom, and splits her time dreaming of Rob and David. Rob. David. Rob. David. Rob. David. She loves glitter, the FF stat page, superheroes with subtle homosexual tendencies, and nonsensical, yet admittedly hilarious rants on preachers with lisps.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Gondolier’s What I Learnt in Riting Skool

Bella’s Got Style

How to make your narrator sparkly

Oh dear TLYDF readers, I have done you a great service. Have you heard the term “style” bandied about in literary circles and nodded along, pretending to know what the heck was being discussed? Has anyone asked you how you chose a writing style for a particular story, and you cobbled out a response that sounded sort-of smart? Well, loverlies, I am hear to play Higgins to your Eliza and help you conquer the English language. In three-thousand words or less, here’s the breakdown on Style. *breaks-it-down*

A writer’s style is the literary manner in which a story is written (not to be confused with tone, which is the emotional manner). According to Stephen Minot, the author of “Three Genres” (which endlessly plagued me in grad school) there are six factors which determine style: diction, syntax, density, narrative modes, tense, and point-of-view.

Did your eyes just glaze over? Yeah, those blah words make me check out too. But stick with me and you might find the fun stuff behind the icky terms.

1. Diction

“Words, words, words, I’m so sick of words!” said Eliza Doolittle when trying to master proper English. Anyone who has struggled to learn English as a second language (or even a first) can relate to this sentiment. A blessing and curse of English is that we have a veritable cornucopia of words at our disposal. It’s cobbled together from Norse and Germanic heritage, Latin and Greek, French, Anglo-Saxon. And we’ve pinched from the Chinese (gong), Indian (khaki), and even Eskimo (kayak).

Because of these various word sources, the English language has a lot of duplication. Though the words have the same meaning, each has a distinctive overtone. For example, you could write that “Carlisle had a sleek car—a black Mercedes Benz.” But we’re talking expensive here, so the better word choice would be “automobile” or “motor car,” because they recall luxury.

So how is word choice important in the style of your fiction? First, whipping out a thesaurus makes your prose more interesting, plain and simple. Second, diction is a major factor in characterization, as well as theme.

Let’s say that your first-person narrator is, oh I don’t know, a seventeen-year-old, small-town girl in the Pacific Northwest. Is she going to speak like an Oxford scholar? Perhaps, but most likely, no. Her narrative style should be intelligent, playful, with a touch of naiveté. Depending on what has happened in her life, she may be more jaded or coarse. Now let’s pretend that she falls in love with a hundred-year-old vampire trapped in a seventeen-year-old body. Is this vampire going to speak a little more formally? Yup.

Each character, whether narrating or speaking in dialogue, is going to have a slightly different diction based on their age, education, personality, and background.

Pitfalls to avoid with diction:

  • Extreme diction.
    Does your character have a raging southern accent? Don’t write the full-out, raging southern accent—hint at it. Sprinkle in a word here, a contraction there, a turn-of-phrase that adds sparkle to the character, but doesn’t overpower the writing.

  • Out-of-character diction.
    While you may be attached to the phrase “le mot juste, ” your average Iowa farmer (no matter how hardworking and intelligent) would not realistically use it. Don’t spoil the realism of a story for the sake of indulgent prose.

2. Syntax

Syntax is sentence structure. Sounds hi-tech, but it’s not. In nonfiction, we use grammatically-proper syntax to clearly convey ideas. In fiction, however, grammatical rules are often bent to show the mood of the speaker—narrator or otherwise. A frustrated speaker’s grammar may break down as they continue speaking. A happy speaker may use light-sounding phrasing. Run-on sentences, incomplete sentences, who cares? Chuck your APA Style Manual, turn off MS grammar check, and rely solely on your ear. Read passages out loud and decide what creates the effect you want.

A common misnomer is that run-on sentences slow the pace of a story. Not so. The rhythm is what controls the pace, not where the period is placed. For example, listen to the manic mood of the narrator in this excerpt from “Gotta Dance” by Jackson Daviss:

Quick taps and slow rolling, jazz it, swing it, on the beat, off the beat, out of one tune right into the next and I never took one break. It was a chill of a night, but didn’t I sweat, didn’t that jacket just have to come off. Didn’t I feel the solid jar to the backbone from the heavy heel steps, and the pump of my heart on the beat on the beat on the beat.

While the author uses long sentences, the rhythm and repetition echoes the rhythm of the narrator’s dancing.

In contrast, if the above paragraph were written as short sentences it would be drawn out, each period packing meaning but losing the rhythm:

Quick taps and slow rolling. Jazz it. Swing it on the beat, off the beat. Out of one tune right into the next…and I never took one break. It was a chill of a night, but didn’t I sweat. Didn’t that jacket just have to come off. Didn’t I feel the solid jar to the backbone from the heavy heel steps? The pump of my heart, on the beat. On the beat. On the beat.

Pitfalls to avoid with syntax:

  • Overuse.
    Standard syntax—sentences with subjects, verbs, and varying length for variety—still needs to be used as a foundation for a piece that isn’t poetic prose. For novel-length works, experimental syntax will become weary and gimmicky. By all means, use it in certain passages to spice up your writing, but don’t bludgeon readers with it.

  • Overwriting.
    If you try to impress readers with long, complex sentences packed with words you found in a thesaurus, you are indulging in what is known as overwriting, aka, the dreaded purple prose. This type of writing comes off as artificial and affected.

3. Density

The level of density in your story style really depends upon the depth of characterization and theme. Low-density stories aren’t badly written—we often describe them as fun, entertaining, or clever. They are quick-reads that, while enjoyable, don’t need to be read twice.

Density is achieved:

      1. when a story develops one or more characters in some detail
      2. when the theme has complexity and insight
      3. or when figurative language and symbolic suggestion are heavily used.

If you feel the style of your story is lighter or more insubstantial than what you desire, here’s a trick. Try developing a character’s conflicting feelings toward an issue. Or take a look at your secondary characters and reveal more about them. Do you have a single theme that can be expanded to include a cluster of themes?

For example, let’s say your seventeen-year-old girl in the Pacific Northwest is involved in an underage drunk driving accident. What sort of sub-themes can you draw from it? Perhaps her Chief of Police father goes on a crusade to clean up the kids in the town. Maybe her vampire boyfriend decides to exact revenge on the driver. Or her school could have a special assembly on the dangers of drinking and driving. In short, consider secondary avenues to bring depth to your story, while still operating within the main theme.

On the flip-side, Maybe you find that your story is too dense. You have so many characters and so many threads, your style becomes cluttered and heavy. If this is the case, kill an off-shoot sub-plot or two. Another fix is to develop a humorous aspect to the chaos and clutter.

Your seventeen-year-old narrator who has been in a drunk-driving accident will have many heavy struggles to face. Medical treatment, counseling, lifestyle alterations. Then you factor in court cases, medical bills and financial issues, and conflicts with friends, and BOOM. You have an overly-dense story. But what if her crusading father bans her from all social activities except for chess club? Balancing a dense story with humor or satire naturally lightens complex plots.

4. Narrative Modes

The five basic tools of fiction, the bricks that build your story, are the “modes”: dialogue, thoughts, actions, description, and exposition (transitions, info between scenes). Your writing style is greatly influenced by how you decide to balance these five modes. They develop character depth. The modes also control the pace of your story.

Balancing the narrative modes doesn’t necessarily mean you must have five equal parts of each. Some styles are more dialogue-heavy, while others are thought-heavy. What it means is finding the perfect narrative flow for the story you are telling. I like to equate writing to driving a car. The narrative modes are your gears:

If your story is…

  • Stuck behind a slow-moving vehicle:
    add dialogue and action. Giving characters a chance to talk and move boosts energy and reduces boggy introspection.

  • A zoom through southern Nebraska:
    reduce trivial dialogue and actions, and replace them with thoughts and description. Give your story scenery and depth to slow it down.

  • Lacking purpose in road-tripping:
    include exposition. Give us more background info for context. But be careful not to become too exposition-heavy, or your story will read like an essay.

Pitfalls to avoid with narrative mode:

Don’t be overly concerned with finding a mode balance when writing your first draft—just write. Save tinkering with modes for revisions and rewrites when you want to get your pace just right.

5. Tense

While a lot of writers make a big deal over choosing past or present tense for their story, let’s be honest. If a story is good, readers will be sucked in within the first few paragraphs and won’t notice whether it’s past or present tense.

There’s really only one good technical reason for using present tense over past tense, and that’s flashbacks. If you plan to write a story with numerous flashbacks, you have two options:

     1. Past tense for the majority of the narrative (“he purchased an engagement ring”) and past-perfect for flashbacks (“he had purchased an engagement ring the night of…”).
     2. Present tense for the majority of the narrative (“he purchases and engagement ring”) and past tense for flashbacks (“he purchased an engagement ring the night of…”)

As you can see, option #2 would definitely be easy-peasy to write if you have a lot of flashbacks.

Other than flashbacks, the chosen tense’s effect on your story is almost negligible past the first page. I’d recommend writing a half-page of your opening, first in past tense, then in present and decide which seems better. You can come up with a clever-sounding reason later.

6. Point of View

The most effective Points of View (POV) for fiction are:

  • First Person
    : “I.” Typically the easiest way to keep the point-of-view from hopping between characters. First Person narratives are usually told by the main character, which means that they are not able to know what the thoughts, feelings, or experiences of the other characters are. They can, however, speculate—which adds a layer of suspense and mystery. (Elsa Neal, “”)

  • Third Person limited
    : “He/She”. Third person limited is the most common way of writing fiction. The story is narrated, but the narrator is invisible, playing no part in the story. However, the perspective of one or more characters is used to draw the reader into the story and develop empathy for the characters. Whatever the length of your story, if you can keep your viewpoint characters down to one or two, you will have a far stronger story and a bigger impact on your readers. When you choose just one main character’s perspective it also makes it easier for you as the writer to stay in their “head”. (Neal)

  • Third Person omniscient
    : “He/She.” This is a very clunky style to read, but is also becoming popular because it resembles a movie, but includes thoughts and feelings. The narration takes a full view of the book, knowing at all times what each character is thinking, presenting all viewpoints at all times, and moving from character to character, and also scene to scene, showing a snapshot of their life and environment. It allows almost no empathy to develop as the reader is shifted along from character to character. (Neal)

  • Second Person
    : “You.” Second person used to be very popular for children’s “solve it yourself” mystery and adventure books: “You are walking down the street and witness a crime. Turn to page 20 if you call the police, turn to page 40 if you run away…” Outside that type of book, second person is hardly ever used, except for an interesting, experimental read. (Neal)

Selecting the viewpoint that best tells a story can be the answer to overcoming writer’s block and fixing problematic stories. For example, let’s say you’ve chosen to write a story in first person, but as you write, you struggle to convey necessary details your narrator isn’t privy to. You may want to switch to third-person omniscient. If you are unsure which POV to use, try writing the same paragraph with different narrator Person, and see which fits best.

[And now a digression…

Okay, I know that a lot of fanfiction writers like to use the “BPOV/EPOV/APOV” method, aka, using First Person in multiple views. I’ve even enjoyed quite a few stories that do this. If you choose to do this, however, you should be aware of several things:

  • When in first person, switching points-of-view is a big no-no because it’s jarring to the reader, interrupts the flow of the narration, confuses the reader because they lose track of whose head they are in, and defeats the purpose of first person narration (keeping other characters’ thoughts a mystery, thus enhancing the suspense and conflict of a story).

  • In the publishing industry, you just can’t do the First Person switching thing. So if you have aspirations to publish someday, it’s good practice not to rely on the First Person switching crutch, even if it’s “just fanfiction.”

  • Third Person omniscient accomplishes the same thing, with benefits. You have no narrative interruptions, less chance of redundancy (because your story is still using only one narrator—the all-powerful Omniscient), and are forced to write those viewpoint transitions instead of just slapping a “POV” heading on a scene.

If you can write your way around the above and still create an effective story using multiple first-person narrators, then go for it. Who am I to stand in the way of innovative fiction?]

So, this article isn’t as interesting to read about as love triangles, but hopefully you gleaned some helpful, foundational stuff. Now break out the thesauruses, listen to Matthew McConaughey’s speech patterns, and play with those modes *cough*. Happy writing!

Gondolier is officially sticking it to the MAN by sharing her wealth of wordcraft knowledge with the likes of fandom. She demonstrates her tremendous skills with every chapter she posts of her wondrous story, Hydraulic Level 5. Bitch Leah anyone?

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